Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Good Grief



Thanks to getting older, and my time in Al Anon, I am much comfortable and familiar with the emotion of grief. If grief surfaces, I feel it rather than stuff it down. I feel grief over the loss of a close friendship. Sometimes when things don't work out the way I had hoped, I feel grief for the way things might have been, and sometimes things work out better than I could have imagined. I love fall so much, and the other day, I got sad summer was ending.

I have a friend who doesn't like autumn and really hates it when summer ends. We have a ritual we do together at the change of each season, and on the equinox, I asked her if she was ready. Her way of saying "no" was to say "It's been fall for like one hour!" "Okay," I smiled, "we'll wait til Day of the Dead." She thought that sounded better. When we can joke about being in denial, we aren't actually in denial. And it's more than okay, maybe even good, to grieve. Maybe grief is a quick joke putting off plans or a new way we have to learn to live.

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