Friday, May 29, 2015

For Being Gentle with Me

I can't tell you kids how grateful I am to be in recovery and to be growing into my own understanding of how little I have control over. I feel very out of my normal routine, and I have since I moved; I live further away from town now (which I love) and calculating my commute has been an adjustment. After having guests in town for a week straight, I was excited to get back on track with regular exercise, only to sprain my ankle. I spent two hours at the DMV today getting the title to my new car transferred to my name and the car registered in New Mexico.

Anticipating going to the DMV this morning, I felt grateful. This would be my third trip there for these purposes; this would have driven me bonkers in the past but thanks to practice in the program, I felt an acceptance. "Hopefully I'll get it all done today," I thought. "But if not, I'll go back." The feeling of gratitude I had for this serenity spread over into other areas of my life as I sat with it. "Thanks God for being gentle with me and letting my injury be a little sprain of my ankle;" I have two friends right now with big old knee injuries and surgeries in their future. I had a misunderstanding with a client this week about scheduling and we both took responsibility for our part in the miscommunication, no one got upset or even frustrated, it was gentle. I didn't remember to bring a book to the DMV, I was happy to catch-up on some emails and stare into space for a change. Just when staring into space got boring, the cute boy next to me wanted to talk; (truly, I don't give a hoot about cute boys, I'm super into my super cute boyfriend) message received. It was gentle.

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