Friday, October 31, 2014

Planting Seeds

"So often we bury things [inside] us [that] we should have planted." --Davidji

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

The Mightiest Force

"To deal gently with our fellowman is suggested in St. Paul's Epistle to the Ephesians: the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, gentleness...

The same thought appears in the fable of the wind and the sun, who challenged one another as to which could first remove the cloak of a passing traveler. As the wind blew hard and cold, the man wrapped the cloak tightly around him; the the sun shone, and its warmth made the man take off his cloak.

Kindness is the mightiest force in the world..."

Friday, October 24, 2014

Any Posture We Find Ourselves In

In yoga, we learn that tension is a form of resistance. This is is easily demonstrated in the postures we take on our mats; we separate ourselves from the poses by tensing our shoulders or wishing the teacher wasn't teaching plank. The same is true for any posture we can find ourselves in in life. I create stress every time I do something while wishing I was doing something else. I create strain when someone's talking to me and I'm not really listening. I create tension every time I wish things were different than they are.

Deepak knows what I'm talking about, "Your mind blocks the free flow of energy by saying, 'This is how things must and should be.' Letting go releases you from this insistent grip, and when you let go, new forms of reality can enter." One day, plank gets easier and the way things are suddenly make perfect sense; these 'new forms of reality' will not be experienced if we let resistance win.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

The Gallbladder Wants to Feel Free

My acupuncturist has been teaching me a thing or two about the gallbladder meridian. In the last few years, I have had my fair share of reoccurring physical complaints around said meridian. When I ask her what else I can do for my gallbladder, she gives me elusive answers that I enjoy, "The gallbladder wants to feel free." "Like, how do you mean?" I ask. "Like taking a different route home from work, or screaming if you want to."

In a such a small town, there really are only a few routes home from work, but I'll do my best. Maybe I'm fooling myself, but I haven't felt too much like screaming, we make funny noises a lot in voice lessons.

I guess my gallbladder meridian has been coming up to show me how truly rebellious I am. Aura and I wrote a sequence together that I'm supposed to teach verbatim for the kids who are in our yoga school; I've had several chances to do it now, and I still haven't. Funny to find out that teaching a class directly from a plan feels too obedient; I used to teach from plans pretty regularly. Yoga school also asks of me to be organized enough to prepare my lunch to bring with me and eat during our midday break. At school, I've actually been eating a whole complete lunch, which is so not my stilo; typically, I like to snack throughout the day and then have dinner.

For the sake of my gallbladder in the midst of all of this structure, I've been cutting up whenever I can. The other day, I got in my friend's hot tub in the middle of the day, even though I had a ton of work to do. I took a nap at 10:30 am. And one time, after my proper lunch at yoga school, I came home and had granola and chocolate for dinner. May all gallbladders everywhere be happy and free.

Friday, October 17, 2014


As my teacher Kay says, a balance between structure and flow.

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Small Town Hygiene

A friend of mine recently had a job interview. Clearly, it went well, the company she interviewed with asked her to create a mock media campaign for an upcoming movie they're releasing. She did a bang up job with it, I know cuz she let me look at it.

She never heard back from the company, and a week after she sent in her mock campaign, she looked at their website and they had re-posted the job; she didn't get it.

When we were talking about it the other day, I got kinda pissed. I don't think it's cool that they never contacted her. A simple "Thank you for applying," at least, would have been courteous. Even though I felt disgruntled, I know that's the way it works. As my friend said, "It's New York, they don't care about little old me."

I've only been out of New York for three years, but I've gotten used to the way things are here. In a small town like Taos, if you don't want to go to therapy anymore, you tell your therapist, you don't just skip your next appointment and then never show up again. And you'd better tell your landlord if your rent is going to be late; and dissolve your affairs kindly. Your therapist, landlord and ex-lover all shop at the same grocery store you do and ya'll are going to run into each other. Mike calls this small-town-inspired honesty "Small Town Hygiene." And I've come to believe Small Town Hygiene is the way to live, even in big cities. It's good for all of us to give our hairdresser another chance after they screw-up royally on our color. And if they bungle it the next time, then it's good for us to be honest and kind when we tell them we're going to try another colorist. Allowing people the change is part of Small Town Hygiene. Sometimes the guy who used to be a jerk to his wife quits drinking, or your hairdresser gets their shit together. Forgive, do your best, and keep your relationships clean, the small town way.

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Acts of Kindness are Generally Received Well

I lied. I have not been able to completely trust my Higher Power's plan for the dog who lives across the street.

On a walk recently, I couldn't help but notice he seemed sad. And then I couldn't stop thinking about him for the rest of the day, and even into the next day. Since we're being honest, I guess you could say I'm having trouble with my Higher Power's plan for the dog. Meanwhile, I know there are many dogs, people and other creatures out there who have it much worse than this one. And sometimes when I have that thought, I feel strong and I pray. And other times I have that thought, I don't feel strong and again, I pray.

The way it hit me the other day, I had to do more than pray. I took a big chewy bone with me to the mailbox to get my mail. When it seemed like nobody was looking, I threw the treat into the dog's yard, as close as I could get it to him. Turns out, as close as I could get it to him wasn't good enough; the bone landed about 2 feet away from where the dog could reach with his mouth, since he's tied up with a chain. My heart pounding, I walked up the dog's driveway, the dog barking fiercely, and I used my mail to pick up the bone and toss it a little closer to him. Happily, he snagged it, stopped barking, and I scurried away.

When I got to my car, I heard a man yelling and I turned around to see it was the dog's person. "What were you doing in my yard?" he shouted. "I was giving your dog a treat," I said. "Oh, okay," he shrugged and turned away. "Thank goodness," I thought. Acts of kindness are generally received well.

Friday, October 3, 2014

Tears and Laughter

"I would not exchange the laughter of my heart for the fortunes of the multitudes; nor would I be content with converting my tears...into calm. It is my fervent hope that my whole life on this earth will ever be tears and laughter." --Kahlil Gibran