Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Wild Horses

I just finished reading Marianne Faithfull's autobiography Faithfull. Spoiler alert: She used to date Mick Jagger. According to her book, it was when they were struggling to break up that he wrote the song "Wild Horses." I've always liked the tune and after reading about its genesis, I've been listening to it a lot. Last Thursday, I played it in yoga class. That night at dinner, my boyfriend and his dad, without any prompting, told me a story of one time when they went to a wild horse auction.

According to Animal Speak, "Horses are symbols of freedom--oftentimes without proper restraints. Horse brings with it new journeys. It will teach you to ride into new directions to awaken and discover your own freedom and power."

For me, freedom can feel tricky. My schedule is in transition right now and there are certain days that feel too free and others that feel too occupied. Some days, I don't have to set the alarm, and on other days, the alarm goes off at 5 am. I come back often to Manorma's quote, "It takes discipline to be a free spirit." I feel better and get more done when most (certainly not all) of my days are pretty packed. On my ideal "work day", my commitments are 50% income-producing activities and 25% self-care activities and 25% everything else. I feel it's these "proper restraints" of 75% work and taking care of myself that gives me the freedom to feel like I can relax. As Mick says, "I have my freedom but I don't have much time."

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