Thursday, October 11, 2012

The Speaker

There are many yogic texts that talk at length about how the more yoga asana one does, the more clean and clear one's throat chakra becomes. I've talked to lots of my students and mentees over the years about how the more we align our breath body to our physical body in yoga class, the harder it gets to NOT align to our truth to ourselves in our lives outside of class. This can manifest any many different ways: we might feel more obliged to tell the truth, even when it's difficult, food we used to eat may suddenly not taste good anymore, and we may not be able to last as long in a relationship that no longer serves us.

I am a recovering exaggerator. Which I both love and hate. I feel like my stories aren't as good anymore without my over-the-top statements about things that are funnier when there's more of them like, habits or... lemmings.

The other day, on the phone, one of my best friends asked me if I miss New York. I came out with a bold "No."  Looking back at my bold no, I think it was out of laziness, but also, exaggeration. Exaggerating about myself in that context, helps me to get over something that I don't have to get over. And I don't miss living in New York. But I DO miss my friends *so much*. A few weeks ago, I was on a gorgeous hillside in Italy at an afternoon wine tasting, weeping about how much I miss my friends.

I went to a lecture on the grief process last night and the speaker talked about one of the last steps of grief which is transformation. He said transformation happens when in the midst of physical pain, we can remember the metaphysical: when we can look at what we're going through from our soul's perspective and integrate it into who we are/what we can become. He kept calling it "the scar of wisdom." Or as somebody said on Facebook once, "Your soul is rooting for you."

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