Thursday, December 29, 2011

Drive Home from Seco

Usually when I drive home from Seco, its dark and the lights of Taos guide me from their distance. I have lots of feelings on that drive. As I search through the night toward my tiny town where I landed, I can't help but think of the lights of a big city where I came from.

I'll get hit by a memory of a friend's smile or exactly how the air felt on a street corner as I rounded to a restaurant, the sirens and the laughter. For those few seconds or minutes on that drive those images will shove my heart into a sadness.
And I'll nurture that sadness. I'll let my heart fall down in it, let it sit in the car with me.

One of my teachers told me once that what's difficult about having feelings is that we think we need to do something about them. In fact, most of the time all we need to do is be okay with them. Be okay with ourselves for having them. Whatever they are. If you know the feeling you're having and you're okay to look at it, you get to watch how it changes. Just like lights in the distance. When you get closer, you'll be able to see what's really there.


Elissa Stein said...

You are brilliant peanut.

AshB said...

Ditto Elissa. Love you.

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